Happy New Year!
Things I Achieved in 2023
I actually did not make any resolutions this year, because in 2023 I already got super fit and made a buttload of money and fell in love and got five promotions and read three hundred books and traveled to six countries and meditated forty hours a day! So I think I deserve a rest.1
Kidding! Here some things I actually did last year.
2023 was the first year in four years that I did not move! In fact, I actually put a few pictures up on the walls. Go me. Maybe this year I’ll put up more.
I used AI to make a cursèd Christmas card. If you did not get one and you would like me to send you one, please reach out. For some reason we ordered 50 of them. As much as I love them, we do not need 50 postcards of Jesus In A Pickup Truck Eating Hotdogs With Spliced-in Pictures of Our Cats.
I did my first escape room! If you haven’t done one, I super recommend. I went with my improv team, which is really the ideal group for an escape room (theater kids who love brain puzzles? Check). We did a Victorian-themed room and the immersive experience gave me major inspiration for next year’s Halloween party.
And I do have a resolution, which is to stay more informed about politics. It’s been a pretty stressful few years (pandemic, insurrection, multiple job changes, and did I mention I moved a billion times?) which definitely prompted me to withdraw from consuming news media since my brain already felt like it was on the brink of frying. But! This is a major election year2 and - I hope I’m being dramatic when I say this - the stakes feel very, very high. So as much as I would love to only focus on writing my next big comedy project3 I realize that there are bigger forces at play in the world.4 All this to say, this year I’m trying to listen to the NPR Politics Podcast when I’m doing stuff like chores or working out. I’ve actually really enjoyed listening so far, and given that this episode was all about the “main character energy” and “character drama” of congress, maybe I’ll pick up some comedy ideas along the way.
👏 5 Things
If you’ve been following the whole Taylor Swift-Travis Kelce thing (even if you haven’t, it’s hard to ignore) I have a made-up conspiracy theory for you (is that redundant? Made-up conspiracy theory? Whatever. I made it up). Here goes: This extremely choreographed relationship between Swift and Kelce is a ploy by the NFL to attract more female viewers, some of whom are moms who may then be more open to letting their young sons play football despite growing concerns about CTE. Whaddaya think? Go easy on me; it’s the first conspiracy theory I’ve ever written. It doesn’t totally make sense, but then again, neither do most conspiracy theories. If you’re looking for actual facts, I suggest this article about the rise of Kelce’s management team.
Someone sent me a clip of stand up Jay Jurden discussing echidna penises, which sent me down a whole rabbit hole (echidna hole?). Turns out there are scientists who have devoted countless hours to studying the genitalia of this unusual animal. Here’s one for you: Solving the Mystery of the Four-Headed Echidna Penis. [Edit: multiple friends told me not to include this because apparently anatomy is “gross”? Despite this, I shall not be silenced! There are things that the people simply need to know!]
I also recently became aware of Orson Welles’ inebriated Paul Masson ad outtakes, a phenom that even has its own Wikipedia page and Star Wars dub. Every day since, G has had to listen to me walk around mumbling “Ohhhhhhhhh, the frenchchampagne”
Someone also sent me this clip of Australian MP Bob Katter’s beautiful segue from discussing gay marriage to the threat of crocodile attacks. Super random, but it made me laugh.
More celebrity news: Actress Sophie Turner is reportedly dating British aristocrat Peregrine “Perry” John Dickinson Pearson, son of Michael Orlando Weetman Pearson, Fourth Viscount Cowdray (cousin of Amelia Mignonette Thermopolis Renaldi, princess of Genovia). But for real, can someone from England please explain to me what in the Bridgerton it all means? It’s just that his family owns some land? G does not understand my fascination with these people, but it’s because they sound like real-life characters (specifically Luke Millington-Drake characters).
Some shows I’m excited about
I’ve already had two improv shows canceled this month because of snow (booo!) but I’m excited to announce that Main Character Energy is returning to Boris & Horton Williamsburg on Friday January 19th at 7pm! This lineup includes some folks who I’ve followed on TikTok for years and I am doing my best to act cool and normal about it. We’re also already scheduled for February, so mark your calendars for Sunday Feb 11th and get ready to join in on the 💕 Valentine’s loooooove show 💕 Finally, I signed on to direct a sketch show for International Women’s Day, so stay tuned!
Love,
Caitlin, Frank, & Bud 💁🏻♀️🐈🐈⬛
Rant: People who make “My 2023 in Review” posts on Instagram. Despite using it almost every day, this has made me realize there is something I fundamentally do not understand about social media. When you are hanging out with friends, do you stop the conversation and say, we need to take a picture? Who remembers to do that? And who takes the picture? And why do the Gen Z girls stick one leg out like that? I am so old and confused.
There are 302 days until the U.S. Election. Are you registered to vote?
I’m thinking a screenplay about a formerly homeschooled girl from Africa learning to navigate the social hierarchy of high school. Maybe eventually a musical? TBD.
Side note, I also just finished watching Andor, which I highly recommend. I know I’m late to the game! It’s so good that it makes me angry at all the other Disney Star Wars crap I wasted my time on when I could have been watching this instead. But it also got me thinking about democracy and power and the importance of community organizing. Anyway, go watch it!